Living with an addict is like living in a waking nightmare. The signs that a problem exists are tell tale and seem to be consistent from case to case. It always follows, too, that the addict is someone we love. If not for love, we could walk away from the situation. Love makes everything more difficult with addiction.
Spouses and loved ones of an addict are known for adaptability. They change constantly in order to avoid emotional blow-ups or drama of any kind. Many times, the person coping with the addictive behavior of a loved one enables the destructive behavior by compensating for issues that arise–making excuses for embarrassing situations, accepting new bargaining tactics from the addict, giving him more chances, believing promises. To a certain extent, this is natural behavior. There comes a point, however, when compromising and contorting to keep peace doesn’t work any longer.
Issuing Ultimatums is a Big Part of Interventions
Communication has broken down and the addict that you love has become a stranger to you. Perhaps this person has become violent with others. Maybe the addiction has caused your family member or friend to steal in order to support the habit. What if you feel completely powerless to help this person you care about? What if you’re watching this person you love destroy himself or herself by surrendering to a drug.
The guilt can be emotionally crippling, too. It is common for the beloved of addicts to fall into patterns of behavior that actually enable their friend’s destructive behavior. Seemingly simple acts like giving them a couch to crash on or a ride to the liquor store can become the direct cause of feelings of direct responsibility for the addict’s downward spiral.
When all other options have been exhausted, an intervention just might be the wake-up call that is so desperately needed. An intervention involves drawing a line in the sand. You tell the addict how his/her behavior is affecting you and others in your social circle. You lay down new rules by finishing this sentence.: “If you do not go to rehab right now, I will. . . “ You can withdraw all financial support. You can bar them sleeping on your sofa, eating your food, or using your vehicle. You can make a solemn promise to disappear from their life if they don’t accept the help and support that are being offered.
Desperate Times/Desperate Measures
Interventions are motivated by desperation. They are effective because they spell out the bottom line. The most important part is following through with the vows that are made. If your loved one agrees to get help immediately, offer every single bit of support and affection you have to give. If he/she refuses to get help, changes must be effective right away. No more second chances when an intervention is in play.
Planning and carrying out an intervention is a very difficult thing to do, but when all else fails, it can save the life of an addict who’s going down fast. Your loved one will, more than likely, not be grateful for your help anytime real soon. That comes further down the line when the addictive substance is removed from the situation. If you stand your ground now, the future will become a better place for you and your loved one.
For resources and information on staging an intervention for an addicted loved one, reach out to Treatment Now.
CALL US TODAY AT 844-438-8689!